We don’t always get to choose what happens to us.
But we do get to choose how we respond.
Tuesday tested that for me.
I drove into Boston for a meeting, parked legally, or so I thought. When I stepped out afterward, my car was gone. First thought? Stolen. But I found a ticketing officer, and she informed me it was towed for street cleaning. Despite no signs near my spot or the pay station stating any such thing.
At each turn, asking the ticket officer, going back to warn the other people inside, heading to a bleak towing lot, I kept repeating to myself:
Who do I want to be right now?
I was frustrated, but I used each breath to choose calm, or at least calmer, over anger.
At the advice of the ticket officer, I headed to Boston Town Hall to appeal both the ticket and the tow charge. The appeal process was another test. While the officer acknowledged no sign was near me and agreed the placement was misleading, she explained Boston law: if a sign exists anywhere on that block, and she found one further down the road, it applies to the whole block.
My appeal was denied.
More deep breaths.
What should have taken 30 minutes to get home turned into four hours. More deep breaths navigating the afternoon traffic on my way home.
It was a trying day.
Were my responses all perfect? No. But I responded and behaved more like the person I want to be. And I didn’t let frustration take over my entire evening. In the past, I would have carried that anger with me.
Tuesday was a frustrating day, a part of life. For me, it was another day of practicing who I want to be and choosing differently. I continue to work on how I respond to life’s frustrations. It is a challenge for me.
It is a continuous practice. One breath, one moment, one choice at a time.
And Tuesday, I chose differently.
In your frustrating moments, how do you respond?
What would change if you asked yourself, who do I want to be right now?
And on another note to the City of Boston. The parking along that entire stretch was full. Everyone was confused by the signs. The ticket officer, and the process around it, seemed to take advantage of the misleading signage, causing unnecessary frustration instead of fixing the actual problem. Mayor Wu, I think the city can do better.
In the photo: the parking signage. Nowhere does it mention street cleaning.
